13 things about DKM I just don’t get
1 – Why does she change her fur every day?
2 – Why does she have to take a bath every day? She has a perfectly functional tongue…
3 – Why does she get all grossed out if some of my food gets on her hands when dishing it up? It’s not like I get all ewwww when I see lettuce.
4 – Why doesn’t she eat meat? That’s just not normal.
5 – Why does she spend hours watching mysteries where the people talk like Charlie, Pandora and Fat Eric.
6 – Why does she not like it when I clean her forehead at night?
7 – Why when I tap her on the back at 3 am with my paw to snuggle, does she need to run to the human litter box? My paw is not that cold.
8 – Why does she go hunting every day and not bring home anything dead for me to eat? I don’t think she is really hunting!
9 – Why does she have to play with the fluffies? I mean, I’m right here!
10 – Why does she get the fur above her eyes ripped off?
11 – Why does she have to wash my blankets just as I’ve finally gotten my smell and fur on every last square inch?
12 – Why does she put me in the tomb of death and make me go places in the car? I hate that.
13 – Finally, why, after I’ve gone out of my way to rub fur on her before she leaves to hunt so others will know she is my human, does she grumble and whip out the sticky rolly thing and take it all off? Why, doesn’t she love me any more?